It's Now or Never by Sharele Hatfield

It’s Now or Never 

As we navigate these uncertain times, it seems like the world has come to a standstill. Across the country, schools are shut down, travel is restricted, and businesses are closed indefinitely. One of the keys to surviving all of this is to take a look at the opportunities that lie in our daily routines being so disrupted. I encourage you to take this time to think about what you really want out of life. Is it another job? Is it a change in a relationship? Is it wanting to prioritize a part of your life that has been lacking? Whatever it is, this is the perfect time to make that change. 

Identify What You Want Most

During these unusual circumstances, this can be the perfect time to focus on what you really want out of life. Perhaps you just want life to go back to normal. But I'd be willing to bet, for most of us, there is some aspect of your life that you want to change. Take this time to identify what you want that change to be. Then, make a plan. Write it down, and talk it over with someone you trust. What do you want to change? What are the concrete steps that are needed in order for that change to happen? Do you need someone to help you make this change? If so, reach out to them. Take this time to strategize about how your new normal is going to look.

Take Action

In order to change, we have to be willing to work for it. What steps does your change require? Do you need to take a class? Do you need to work on your resume and cover letters? Do you need to spend more time with someone? Look around for opportunities to complete the steps in your plan. Right now, a lot of online class platforms are offering free trials. Sign up for one, and learn something new. In this time of social distancing, download something like FaceTime or Zoom onto your phone and reconnect with someone who you have been missing. Use your time wisely, work hard, and follow the steps in your plan in order to make a change in your life.

Be Accountable

You may have heard the expression that a dream without a plan is just a wish. I would take it a step further, and say a plan without accountability is just a wish. Have someone who you are accountable to. Tell them about the change that you want to make in your life right now. Tell them about your plan. Then, have them commit to checking in with you every so often to make sure that you are hitting all your steps and working hard. If you are not accountable to anyone, you may never accomplish your goals.

Stop waiting for the perfect time to make a change in your life. That time is now. Take this time to figure out what you want, and make the steps to make that happen. Be accountable to someone. As we see all the tragedy in the world today, we know that life is precious. Adopt the mindset of “it's now or never”, and get going on reaching your goals! 

Supporting Others During Difficult Times by Sharele Hatfield

Supporting Others 

During this unprecedented time, it is so important to support others. We can use our gifts and talents to help people in their time of need. By doing so, we can also help ourselves feel better by contributing and helping those less fortunate. Read on to find some practical ways that we can help to support others, especially when so many need our support.

The Power of Prayer

One of the first ways that you can help to support other people is to pray for them. Make a list of those for whom you would like to pray, and if there is something specific each of those people need, write that down too. Take some time in the morning or at night do you remember those who need our support in prayer. Ask God to help them overcome their trials, and to give them strength.

Practical Partnerships

Another vital part of supporting other people is to make sure that their physical needs are being met. Take the time to check on your neighbors, your school, and your community. Are there people in need of money, time, or talent? Some practical ways to support members of your community during a crisis include going grocery shopping for them, bringing them a meal, helping them with yard work or other household chores, or offering to babysit any children that they may have. Helping out in these practical ways can take some of the burden off of someone doing through a hard time. 

Being Present 

Supporting other people through a hard time also means showing up for them. Many times, people just want someone to be a listening ear. Show up, be a shoulder to cry on and a hand to hold, and then figure out a way to make them laugh. Being present goes a long way in helping someone go through a tough time. 

I hope that you can use these tips in order to help someone in need. During this difficult time, we all need some support. Perhaps you have heard the adage “to make a friend, be a friend”. That is especially important to remember now that we all need some support. Go be a friend to someone today, and watch how it raises your spirits, too! 

Dealing With Isolation by Sharele Hatfield

Dealing With Isolation

COVID-19 is the topic of every conversation as is the resulting quarantine. Schools have been closed, churches have closed there buildings and important events have been cancelled. Our daughter's very first dance competition was cancelled. She is devastated as I'm sure so many are also with the cancellation of events that you have been looking forward to attending . Important family events, such as baptisms, weddings, and graduations have been postponed indefinitely for many families. Sporting events, plays, concerts, and other events being cancelled have left millions of school kids disappointed. Finally, the closure of many community centers, libraries, restaurants, and museums have left people with nowhere to go and no way to connect. So how do we deal with isolation during this time? Read on to find ways to keep connected and keep sane, even when we can’t see people in person. 

Get Outside

As long as we leave some distance between people, there is no reason why we can’t get outside and get some exercise! Go for a hike, walk your dog, go for a bike ride, or go geocaching. Getting outside is a proven way to boost your mood, and everyone can benefit from a little extra Vitamin D! 

Hang Out Online

Even if you can’t see your friends or family in person, you can utilize Skype, Zoom, Google Hangouts, or another type of video service to see and talk to your loved ones. Take your book club online, reconnect with an old friend on Facebook, or Facetime with a relative. Technology can help us stay connected even while we are social distancing. 

Virtually Visit 

Many museums and zoos have virtually opened their doors, even when they are closed to the public. Take a virtual tour of a great museum that you might not get to visit otherwise, or watch animals on camera. Many zoos have cameras on their cutest animals, such as the pandas or penguins. Several aquariums also have video set up, and there are dozens of eagle cams set up around the country. Watch a baby eaglet hatch or check out some great paintings online! 

Learn Something New 

Your local library often has free courses that you can take on a wide variety of topics, such as languages, business, crafts, cooking, and more. Additionally, many online learning providers are waiving fees during this time, so you can get on and try a new skill that you’ve always wanted to learn. This may be the perfect time to learn to knit, speak another language, decorate a cake, or start your own business. 

Look For Ways to Support Someone Else

If you are reading this, I imagine you are in a better position than so many others. Take time to send a card to a nursing home or send an encouraging message to a new mother. Two minutes of your time encouraging and supporting someone else can make dealing with this isolation more bearable for someone else and in turn help you feel better about yourself.

This time in our world can be scary and isolating, but if you look at it as an opportunity to try something new, get outside, reconnect with loved ones, support someone else, it will change your mindset and help you deal with the isolation we are experiencing! 

Redefining Your Life By Deborah Brassell

Redefining Your Life

Gathering pieces of shattered glass is a doting task, but it is necessary in order to prevent further harm to one’s self or those that may cross its path.

Such is life after a crisis; whether from an illness, the death of a loved one or adivorce. We are left torn into pieces without direction.

But in spite of your circumstances, let me be very clear “You can recover from anything”

Victim to Victor

The victim mentality becomes a strategy to deal with the tragedies of life. This mindset only intensifies your pain and cripples your efforts to possessing the power to change your own story. Give yourself time to process, but don’t get stuck in the why.

Helping Others

Use your situation to help others who have experience similar trouble. In doing so, you are instilling purpose and adding value to your life. Helping others bring great fulfillment for both parties involved and creates great emotional bonds.

Be kind to yourself

Choose to walk in the path of forgiveness and treat yourself to life’s most desirable treasures. Be observant and count each blessing day by day. Remember you are still fragile so don’t be afraid to set limits and boundaries.

As each piece of your life is meticulously being put back together it is vital that you frame it with good and healthy relationships. Your circle will determine your success.

Crisis does not have to be a death sentence. Rather, it is an opportunity to Redefine yourself and begin a new chapter.

Join the conversation. Comment below.

Meet the author

Deborah Brassell is a Motivational Speaker and Certified Life Coach. She has devoted 23 years of her life in working in various aspects of ministry and community outreach. She is the founder of Redefined & Co which is a natural skin/aromatherapy business that targets the professional busy mom and challenges women to redefine their life. 

She has a tremendous passion for the youth and currently volunteers as a mentor for “Hope for Johnstown” which works with young teen girls in underserved communities. She is the founder of “Girls Only” which provides mentorship and training for adolescents and young teens. Deborah has worked beside her husband in Marriage and Family workshops as well as their bible study entitled “The New You”.

Through her prophetic teaching and gift of deliverance she shares the many trials she has faced in marriage, parenting and ministry. She has patterned her life off the belief that you can recover from anything. Her many sermons has blessed many people both young and old and she is known for such messages as “Dream Again” and “Making it on Broken Pieces”. Her ministry focus is helping people identify toxic relationships, controlling environments and spiritual abuse.

Face Your Fears by Krystle Johnson

“Face your fears”

I’ve noticed that we are normally our own biggest critic, at least in my case I am! Always second guessing myself or worried about what people will say about my ideas, or who will support me! And blah blah blah! Since I was a child I was always afraid to start new things in spite of failing. I never want to let people down especially my grandma! She use to always tell me how I perfect and proud of me she is so I think I always wanted to keep that impression. To keep that I never starting anything new which  allowed me to never fail anything!!  Being a mother was just another “excuse” I used. I don’t have the time, how can I balance life a kid and starting a business or anything else? 

You never know what you can do until you just DO IT!!

Modeling

Growing up I was always a Tomboy! A lot of people use to call me Scotty, based off my last name at the time. I don’t know if it was solely on the last name Scott or that I was such a tomboy! Probably a combination of both. It’s so funny cause one of my cousins still calls me that from time to time! I literally didn’t wear dresses or wear purses for a long time. When I moved to Atlanta i started to become girly! And that’s when my life of quiet shy tomboy Krystle became Aunje’ (that’s my middle name) I came into a world I never expect too!! The first video I did was for an Atlanta group called Edubb, now I have NEVER expected to be any type of video girl or model so it was truly unexpected. Remember I am a tomboy and shy I didn’t know how to be cute or sexy let alone in front of a bunch of people I don’t know and cameras! They say I was a natural, and they couldn’t tell I was nervous at all. Go figure! From there things took off and I can honestly say I was not expecting it at all! Through out my modeling career I’ve done over 20 music videos, 2 book covers, extras in tv shows, a local commercial and was a promotional model for Nuvo liqueur! Due to me putting myself out there to be uncomfortable opened me up to meeting so many different types of people, I was able to travel and make many connections! Most importantly it allowed me to come out of my shell! Without even knowing at the time it was preparing me for me next ventures! 

Kimaras Promise 

Once modeling started slowing down I was able to focus on something that really captured my heart! Giving back! When I was younger I volunteered with my church in Denver to build houses for Habitat for Humanity, we also use to go to Nursing homes! I can remember the feeling it gave me to just know and witness the love I was able to give back! I knew that I wanted to do more! When I gave birth to Kimara I made a promise to her that I would always do whatever it took to make sure she learned everything that I didn’t and i promised to never give up on her! Hints the name of my Non profit! Until I really knew exactly what I wanted the direction of it to go I just passed out food to the homeless. I moved back to Kansas City then had my son Kayden and in came the excuses again! I’m a single mother working and blah blah blah! I hated my job and I prayed that God please show me what I was supposed to be doing in life! That next day Kimara asked me “ Momma how come we don’t feed the homeless like we did in Atlanta” I had no excuses to give her, just told her we would start again! Then a few days later the best sign I could ask for (didn’t seem good at the time but it was) I got FIRED!! And Kimaras promise began. I wanted to give my promise to other mothers who may not have had anyone to give them a promise at life. So I put together an event to help women get back into the workforce, I wanted to provide interview tips, give business attire etc! I was putting in all my efforts (or so I thought). The day of I was so excited yet nervous. So many supporters and vendors showed up but only ONE person to receive the services! I was devastated and even cried at the event and I truly wanted to give up BUT I just couldn’t! After that I continued feeding the homeless but added toiletry packets, had team along with a pastor come out with me to do Gods work! Long story short I moved back to Atlanta and partnered with Good Will where I was able to actually put my ideas to use! Days before their job fairs I was able to help with resume writing, business attire and interview tips. Ended up working  with 3 different locations in the metro Atlanta area.

CenterLink

Another idea that was sent to me from God! When this idea came to me I was in the middle of doing homework. It literally popped in my mind “ you should put together a women’s brunch”. I was like huh where that come from. I left it alone and the next day something else popped in my head “ ask Lydia And Larese to help! Now these two ladies have never met but who am I to deny what God is telling me to do! So I set up a meeting and from there we created “Center Link” it was a way for women entrepreneurs to meet and network. Our first big awards brunch was in Kansas City where we all are from ( we lived in different cities Atlanta, Nashville and Los Angeles) there was so much planning that went into this. I was working, going to school, doing events for Kimaras Promise and had my two kids! But I felt soooo empowered that I couldn’t let that stop me!  The event was a total success even with the little hate we got (not really sure why when it was such an amazing thing for Kansas City, maybe because we didn’t live there anymore) either way we pulled that event off with a BANG! There were a lot of ups and downs not only because we were all in different states but 2 of us 3 never met until the week of the first event! I must say that we stuck together and was able to pull off yet another amazing Awards brunch in LA.

Please comment below on some fears you currently have or fears you’ve overcome!!!

About the author 

Krystle Johnson: Becoming a mother at 19has been challenging but never stopped me from me from evolving! It’s taught me how to love unconditionally, move with passion and that everything i do is being watched! Every day i strive to make myself better as a person but more importantly as a mother! I created Mom Ohh My for mothers to have a safe place to learn and share tips, release and grow with no judgement! 

https://momohhmy.blogspot.com/?m=1

Overcoming Panic by Sharele Hatfield

Overcoming Panic

As the COVID-19 pandemic continues to spread, many people across the world are experiencing a sense of anxiety, restlessness, and worry. These feelings, coupled with 24/7 news coverage of the spread of the disease, can lead to panic. Panic on a large scale can be devastating and make us act irrationally. For example, there are videos from across the United States of people fighting over toilet paper and bottled water. So how can we overcome a sense of panic and focus on reality instead of giving in to fear? Read on to find some tips and tricks to keep calm and focus on the good things in life. 

Take a Breath

When feelings of panic threaten to overwhelm you, pause. As difficult as it may seem to calm your racing mind, physically stop what you are doing. Take a deep breath in through your nose, then blow it out for 10 seconds. Focus on your breath, Do this for at least one minute, or however long it takes to calm your mind and reduce your heart rate. Breathing exercises such as this can help calm your panic by making you slow down and relax. Nobody can accomplish anything in a state of panic. This is the first step to overcoming your rising sense of panic. 

Count Your Blessings and Pray 

Another trick to quell your panicky feelings is to focus on what you are grateful for, and what blessings you have in your life. Do you have a great spouse, loving children, a cozy home, food in your fridge, or a furry companion? Take stock of the blessings in your life, and reframe your thinking around the situation that is causing you to feel panic. Write down what you are thankful for. Keep pictures of your loved ones close by. Spend time with your pets and the people who you love. Have someone you can call when you are feeling especially panicky. Focusing on what’s good in your life, rather than on the things making you feel panic, will do your mindset a world of good. After counting your blessings be sure to express your appreciation and thanks to our Heavenly Father for his faithfulness and mercy towards you.

Unplug 

We live in a 24/7 news cycle. There are terrible things streaming on our TVs every second of every day. Talking heads are constantly adding to the fearmongering so that news channels have enough material to keep their ratings up. On top of this, most of us are on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or other social media that pumps bad news at us with every click. Do your mental health a favor and unplug. Stop looking at the latest scary article your cousin just put up on Facebook, and stop listening to the experts on the news rattling off grim statistics. Go for a walk, read a book, play a board game. Do whatever you need to do to unplug and stop focusing on the negative digital news. 

Be Patient 

Whatever is going on in your life, or in the world, that is making you feel panic, will not last forever. Bad personal situations can be changed. Pandemics will eventually fade and life will return to normal. Know that nothing lasts forever, and with a little patience and faith, life will not always be so hard. 

By slowing down to take a breath, focusing on the good in your life and being thankful, giving yourself a chance to unplug, and having patience, you can overcome feelings of panic about whatever your current situation is! 

Join the conversation.  Comment below.

Subscribe above

Find me on IG at https://www.instagram.com/p2live/

Find me on FB at https://www.facebook.com/stuckerhatfield

Find me on Twitter @4lifeofpurpose

Strength Thrоugh Adversity By Sharele Hatfield

Strength Thrоugh Adversity. Purроѕе In Everything.

Yоu can tell a lоt about a person of purpose bу the way he or she hаndlеѕ adversity. Yоu'vе seen it, I'm ѕurе. Sоmе сrаѕh and burn, while others ѕtumblе аnd totter and wаvеr fоr a bit, but thеn соmе bасk up stronger thаn ever bеfоrе. 

Life is nоt a battlefield, a сhеѕѕbоаrd, or a рriѕоn. Lifе iѕ mоrе likе a ѕсhооl. Wе аll undеrѕtаnd the bаѕiс concepts оf ѕсhооl and how it is built in a nаturаl рrоgrеѕѕiоn. In соllеgе, you еnrоll in a dеgrее оr certificate program in уоur field оf сhоiсе. Hоwеvеr, уоu have tо firѕt complete a core сurriсulum of gеnеrаl ѕtudiеѕ bеfоrе you can advance tо уоur mаjоr сlаѕѕеѕ. And within thе соrе сurriсulum, сеrtаin сlаѕѕеѕ rеԛuirе рrеrеԛuiѕitеѕ bеfоrе уоu can mоvе fоrwаrd. For еxаmрlе, оnе muѕt соmрlеtе Literature 101 аnd 102 bеfоrе moving on tо 200 аnd 300 lеvеl classes. If you don't раѕѕ a rеԛuirеd соurѕе, you have to take it аgаin until you gеt thе раѕѕing grаdе. 

It'ѕ the ѕаmе wау in lifе. There аrе lessons wе have tо lеаrn to mоvе fоrwаrd, and whеn wе don't learn thе necessary infоrmаtiоn, wе hаvе tо repeat the lеѕѕоn оvеr and оvеr until wе learn what wе nееd tо knоw tо mоvе fоrwаrd. And with еасh repeated сlаѕѕ the рrосеѕѕ becomes mоrе painful. 

Think аbоut this concept in light of your оwn lifе. Hаvе you ever fоund yourself in thе ѕаmе bаd position оvеr аnd оvеr аgаin? Dоеѕ it have tо dо with mоnеу рrоblеmѕ? Do yоu pay оff сrеdit cards only tо max thеm оut again and аgаin with nо еnd in ѕight? 

Or реrhарѕ уоu tеnd tо fall fоr thе "high riѕk-high gаin" рrоmiѕе. It lооkѕ ѕо good at the оutѕеt, and уеt timе and аgаin it turnѕ аgаinѕt you аnd gоеѕ ѕоuth аlmоѕt bеfоrе you know whаt hit уоu. But уоu'rе sure next timе will bе diffеrеnt. 

Thеrе iѕ a ѕtrоng роѕѕibilitу thаt a lеѕѕоn iѕ contained here thаt has not уеt bееn lеаrnеd. It probably соntаinѕ еxасtlу whаt уоu nееd tо learn tо mоvе onto thе nеxt ѕtер to achieve exactly whаt уоu wаnt. 

Whеn you lооk at lifе thiѕ wау there are no mistakes, only nесеѕѕаrу valuable lеѕѕоnѕ. Yоu саn еnjоу grеаt times, but then realize thаt whеn times аrе nоt so grеаt, уоu juѕt might be amid a рrе-rеԛuiѕitе thаt iѕ nееdеd tо tаkе уоu whеrе you wаnt tо gо.

Yоu аrе invеѕting in Life 101, thе ѕсhооl of lifе. Learn your lеѕѕоnѕ wеll, аnd gеt on dоwn thе road in уоur journey tо living a rich and fulfillеd life.

Join the conversation.  Comment below.

Subscribe above

Find me on IG at https://www.instagram.com/p2live/

Find me on FB at https://www.facebook.com/stuckerhatfield

Find me on Twitter @4lifeofpurpose

Be the Mom You Want to Be By Erin Slutsky

I love being a mom but…

How would you finish that statement?

I love being a mom but...I get so frustrated

I love being a mom but...I’m afraid I’m going to mess it up

I love being a mom but...I don’t have what it takes

Being a mom is the world’s most important job. It’s also one of the hardest jobs.  We are raising the next generation after all  (no pressure).

We are expected to just “know” what to do. 

Our kids don’t come with an instruction manual.

We are left to try, fail, learn on our own how to be the best mom for our kids.

I mean, there are parenting books, moms groups, family and friends to go to for support but in the end, we get this one chance to “do it right.”

And what does doing it right even mean?

What kind of mom do you want to be?

The best, right? 

Well, your kids don’t want a perfect mom, they want YOU! 

So, what gets in the way of becoming the mom you want to be?

Does fear, anger and MomGuilt trip you up? 

We all struggle at times in these areas, some more than others. Wouldn’t it be great to know what triggers those feelings? How to get on top of them? How to gain confidence and enjoy being a mom?

You CAN know what causes you to feel frustrated, afraid, and guilty as a mom. 

Self-awareness is the key. Knowing why you do what you do, how you're wired, and how you see the world creates confidence, peace, and empathy. 

Here are 3 areas you can gain confidence and become the mom you want to be.

Fear

Do you wish you could wrap your kids up in bubble wrap when you send them to school?

Are you tossing and turning all night, worried about your kids' future?

Do you track your child’s every breath, every move, every word?

Our children’s world should be a safe place. It’s our job as moms to protect our kids from danger. But that’s not always possible.

I get it! 

We get bombarded with TMI on the Internet. School shootings, sickness, fake news. 

I would find myself comparing to other moms to make sure I wasn’t missing something or that I was doing it “right.”

Then I discovered what triggered my fear.

When I became more self aware of what caused these feelings of anxiety and thoughts of being out of control, I became more confident and began to parent in courage. 

My kids saw that I was doing the best I could and started to trust myself. They didn’t feel like I was overprotecting them anymore and being that “helicopter mom” that caused them to be afraid.

Ask yourself...

What am I afraid of?

Is this a real or perceived fear?

What is the worst that could happen? (And play that story out in your head).

Most of our fears and stories we tell ourselves don’t happen or come true. These questions will help you see things clearly and calm your anxious heart.

Anger 

Do you find yourself yelling at your kids all the time? 

Are you ready to lose it? 

Do your kids hide from you, afraid of you? 

Do they lie to you so you don’t get mad?

I get it! I was an angry mom, yelling at my kids to get them to do what I wanted them to do. Yelling at them because they messed up. Yelling at them as if they were to blame for my unhappiness.

Then I learned about what triggered my anger. That self awareness gave me the tools and the confidence I needed.

I started to enjoy being a mom. I let things roll off my back and gained peace in my home. My kids started to open up and trust me with what was going on. Our relationship is now based on trust and forgiveness.

Do you want to enjoy being a mom?

Ask

What do I need to “let go” of to create a sense of peace, joy and happiness in your family?

Why am I so frustrated?

Am I afraid of something?

Finding out where the anger is coming from will create empathy for yourself and your kids.

Shame/Guilt 

Do you struggle with MomGuilt? 

Are you scouring the internet for solutions, guides and formulas to make sure you are doing it “right”?

Are you looking at other moms, comparing your mothering to theirs?

Are you beating yourself up for mistakes and insecure that you have what it takes?

I get it!

I felt guilty about not knowing my daughter had ear infections until she was 3. I would yell at her for not listening to me. I didn’t know she couldn’t hear me. I would beat myself up and tell myself that I was a failure and was a bad mom.

The first thing that needs to be clear is to make sure you know the difference between guilt and shame because the solution is different. 

MomGuilt says “I did something bad.”

This is solved by apologizing and asking for forgiveness.

Shame says “I am a bad mom.”

The solution to shame is different.

Shame goes deep. Its core is negative self talk, false beliefs, and self accusations.

Shame says:

I am defective (damaged, broken, a mistake, flawed). 

I am incompetent (not good enough, inept, ineffectual, useless). 

I am bad (awful, dreadful, evil, despicable). 

I am nothing (worthless, invisible, unnoticed, empty). 

If you find yourself these stories and lies

Ask: 

What am I THINKING? (Is it true?)

What am I FEELING? 

What are my ACTIONS?

How does my BODY feel? Respond?? 

Believing what is true about yourself and the situation will create a sense of confidence and courage.

Fear, anger and shame are areas all moms struggle in. But as you become more self aware, change will be easier, more effective, and lasting.  You will have the confidence, joy, and peace you desire and become the mom you want to be. 

About the author

I’m a mom of four very different and wonderfully unique kids. And a grandmother of one adorable granddaughter! 

I’m also a nurse, an accredited Enneagram practitioner, and MOPS International mentor and coach with 20 years of experience. I understand child development and family dynamics.

Through MomSense Coaching, I highlight your strengths and share specific ways you can use your natural tendencies to become a more comfortable and confident mom.

Connect with Erin here: http://momsensecoaching.com/