The positives of negative self-talk

Just kidding. I actually think that negative self talk can be very detrimental to your spiritual, emotional and physical well being.

You may not realize it but you are likely having self talk right now.

Self-talk is your inner voice and it can be both positive and negative.  The voice in your mind which says things that you don’t necessarily say out loud. Self-talk happens without you or I even being consciously aware of it occurring. But what you say in your mind can determine a lot of how you feel about who you are.

Self- talk is one of the greatest influences on confidence and mood. Before we discuss tips to improve self talk let's make sure we are clear on the difference between positive and negative self talk.

Positive self-talk is the stuff that makes you feel good about yourself and the things that are going on in your life. It is like having an optimistic voice in your head that always looks on the bright side.  Examples of positive self talk are:

• I am as capable as anyone else out there
• I know with time and effort I can accomplish anything
• I know who I am and I am special
• I am worthwhile, successful, and happy

Negative self-talk is the stuff that makes you feel lousy and inadequate about yourself and your accomplishments. It puts a downer on everything. Examples of negative self talk are:

• I'm not worth it
• I'll never follow through
• Others are better than I am
• I must be perfect

Here are three tips to help you improve self-talk:

1. Listen to and monitor your self talk.

  

We are not always consciously aware of what we're saying in our mind. Starting

today take note of what you are saying in your mind. Actually write it down and think 

about. Use the following to question it:

• Is it positive or negative?
• What would I say if a friend were in a similar situation?
• Is there a more positive way of looking at this?
• Am I keeping everything in perspective?
• Can I do anything to change what I’m feeling bad about?

2. Treat yourself as a dear friend. 

If a friend were discussing a problem with you would you be demeaning, disparaging, or negative. Depending on the situation, I highly doubt it. You would likely be supportive, compassionate and understanding. Speak to yourself the same way you would speak to a dear friend.

3. Replace negative influences with positive ones.

Identify negative outside influences that may be holding your thoughts hostage. Your mental state can become toxic by being around negative people. If you are not vigilant, you'll unconsciously adopt the thoughts of negative friends. If your negative influences are from people, limit your exposure to them and refrain from discussing your plans with those who won't be supportive of your goals and dreams. Instead surround yourself with supportive people with positive thoughts, actions and beliefs.

So I guess the positives of negative self-talk is that once you become aware of it you can change it. You will ultimately improve your confidence and likely improve your relationships. 

If this has helped you or stirred up anything for you please comment below. I'd love to discuss with you.